Surviving the Holidays Post-Adoption in Arizona
The Holidays are supposed to be a time where we celebrate with our family and reflect on many of the things we are thankful for. However, some birth mothers may feel a growing sadness as the holidays approach. Because the holidays are so heavily perceived as a time where loved ones are supposed to gather and enjoy one another’s company, birth mothers may become isolated from the experience. While it is normal to feel sad over your child’s absence, that is no excuse for you to exempt yourself from the joy of the holidays. Adoption Choices of Arizona wants you to enjoy your holidays to the fullest. We aim to provide birth mothers with any and all information they may need regarding post-adoption in Arizona. Of the adoption agencies in Arizona, we are truly one of the most reliable and dedicated. We pride ourselves on our ability to assist you throughout the adoption process, and more than anything, our goal is to see you and your child succeed.
Allow Room For How You Are Feeling About Your Adoption
Putting a child up for adoption is a very taxing process, both mentally and physically, so it is important to first try and be easier on yourself around the Holidays. The fact that you made such a brave choice despite its difficulty deserves praise. Really try and treat yourself with the love you would extend to a family member. Suffering feelings of depression or grief is an ordeal in itself, so do not fall into the trap of validating your negative feelings.
That being said, it is also important to allow for there to be room for these negative feelings. While you should always try to avoid falling into the trap of putting yourself down while experiencing strong negative emotions, not allowing yourself to acknowledge these feelings will prevent you from processing them. If possible, begin by confiding in your family as a whole, or even a singular loved one. Letting people in allows you to feel seen so that you do not have to suffer alone.
How to Process Your Grief During the Holidays
For birth mothers who have an open adoption, it may be beneficial to get in contact with your child. This type of adoption allows for a relationship wherein you can play some role in your child’s life, so we recommend you use it if this is an option for you. Perhaps you can give them a call or even get them a gift, with the consent of their adoptive parents. This all depends on the stipulations that both parties would have agreed to during the adoption process, but so long as you communicate within the confines of your agreement, then reaching out to your child can be a viable way to assuage some of the grief you may be feeling.
It is entirely possible that these feelings of depression and grief may recur annually around the holidays. As such, it is best not to fight these feelings but rather to accept them and find ways to include your child. The adoption type you have will inevitably play a role in your ability to include your child in your celebrations. However, there is no need to be limited. With a little creativity, you will be able to find a solution that works for you. Consider making a Christmas ornament for them that you can place on your tree every year, or maybe lighting a candle in their honor. You can even give a toast at dinner or if your family says grace, mention them in your prayers.
Sometimes, what you feel may be too overwhelming, and that is okay. The holidays carry with it an image of hosting a party for the whole family, cooking an elaborate meal, and watching after the children before they tear your home to shreds. This can, understandably, seem like a daunting task to a birth mother trying to process her feelings about her adoption in Arizona. If you need to relieve yourself from these aforementioned responsibilities, do so by all means. Taking time to care for your own well-being is not only essential to processing your feelings, but it is also essential for living a long and healthy life.
We Are an Adoption Service Aimed At Assisting Your Before and Post Adoption in Arizona
The Holidays should be a great time for you to spend time with family and reflect on the passing year, and feelings of grief or depression should not get in the way of you enjoying the season. Every birth mother who puts their child up for adoption makes a difficult but selfless choice in doing so. It is important to remember your strength and to surround yourself with healthy coping mechanisms so that you can enjoy the holidays like you deserve to.
For adoption resources or to begin your adoption journey, birth parents can visit us at Adoption Choices of Arizona or call or text us at 1-480-900-5520. If you are a prospective adoptive family hoping to adopt a baby, please instead, visit us here!
Meet the author: David T. Garcia is currently a student at Syracuse University working towards his degree in English with a concentration in film. He is a resident of Northern New Jersey and spends much of his time in New York City, whether it be for business or pleasure. David is looking forward to graduation so he can begin his life and pursue his ambitions. He has dreams of moving out to New York City and working as a young professional in the content writing space while also working on his own screenplays. In his free time, David enjoys spending time with family as well as watching movies and reading books. He has a passion for travel and looks forward to new experiences.