As a woman who has chosen to place your child for adoption, you may have questions about what will happen at the hospital on the day the baby is born. More specifically, some of you may have questions about seeing your baby in the hospital. You might be worried that spending time with the baby might make it even more difficult to go through your adoption plan. Interestingly, it has been noted that the opposite outcome has been true.
Making a hospital plan or birth plan when you decide to place a baby for adoption can be stressful. If you’ve already talked to your adoption specialist about it, you’ve probably heard them say, “only you know what’s right for you”, so let’s build on that and talk about how things might work in the hospital when your baby is born…
Over the years, many birth parents who chose not to spend time with their baby in the hospital have told us that they regretted that decision. From our experience as adoption professionals in Arizona, birth mothers who see and hold their baby after delivery tend to be better able to process the adoption later on because they don’t have unanswered questions about what their baby looked like or about what it would have felt like to hold, smell, and hear their baby.
If you are in the process of making an adoption plan in Arizona, you may worry that spending time with your baby will create a bond between the two of you that will then make it impossible for you to place them with another family. The fact is, adoption is bittersweet no matter what; deciding not to see your baby won’t change that.
Many of the birth mothers we have worked who have changed their mind about adoption were the same ones who made the decision not to spend much or any time with their baby while in the hospital. In some cases, their unanswered questions and feelings became too overwhelming and they ended up going back on the entire plan or having regrets.
Seeing and spending time with your newborn baby doesn’t have to be an all-or-nothing scenario in your adoption plan. You get to decide how much contact you want to have. Maybe you want to look at your baby through the nursery window but not hold them. Or perhaps you’d like to have just have an hour or two with your baby. You’re in control; you get to make the plan, and you can always change your mind. And we know we’ve said it before, but…only you can know what’s right for you!
For adoption resources or to begin your adoption journey, birth parents can visit us at Adoption Choices of Arizona or call or text us at 1-480-900-5520. If you are an prospective adoptive family hoping to adopt a baby, please instead, visit us here!