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Birth Mothers and the Adoption Process

By Veronica Wiley

All birth mothers have concerns about the next chapter in their lives after the baby is born. All mothers also fight with misconceptions others have about them. They also fight with their own misconceptions they’ve developed about certain topics. These could be about why parents choose certain parenting styles, nursing or bottle feeding, and how or when you switch your baby to solid foods. If a birth mother falls into a choice that is linked to a misconception, they may feel unnecessary guilt.

As a birth mother choosing adoption, you may also face some misconceptions. Both misconceptions that you’ve developed and misconceptions others have about your decision to choose adoption. Here, we’re going to talk about your role, some things you may face, and dispel any myths you may have heard about birth mothers and adoption.

The Adoption Process

The adoption process consists of three parties: The birth mother, the baby, and the adoptive family. You may be in a situation where placing the baby for adoption is the best option for your situation.  Adoption agencies in Arizona can help birth mothers find loving families to match with their child. This is done by providing counseling and legal help to birth mothers. We also help our adoptive families create profiles to provide to birth mothers. A counselor will sit with you and go over each of the profiles with you and help you select the best one for your baby.

Working with a private adoption agency in Arizona gives you more control over the decision for your baby. A couple of these decisions include how open you would like the adoption to be and viewing prospective family profiles. 

Birth Mothers Important Role in Adoption

When we refer to a birth mother, we are talking about the woman who carries the baby in her womb and gives birth to the baby. You have a very special role in the adoption process.

Ultimately, it is the birth mother who chooses adoption for her baby. However, sometimes the birth father plays a part as well. If the couple is married, or if the birth father is present, he may need to consent to adoption as well as the birth mother. This is because sometimes a birth father still wants to raise the child. A few situations can cause forfeiture of the father’s parental rights. If he is not present, cannot be contacted, or is not interested in raising the child, his parental rights will be forfeited. In these situations, the birth mother will be the decision-maker in the adoption process. For more information on birth father consent, please check with one of our adoption specialists.

Why People Are Choosing Adoption

People choose adoption for a number of reasons. One of those reasons is an unplanned pregnancy. Unplanned pregnancies can cause stress on a family as well as unexpected financial burdens. Another reason a birth mother may choose adoption is her measures to prevent pregnancy failed. When a woman is not ready for pregnancy, she may take precautions to prevent it. Sometimes, those preventative measures fail and result in pregnancy. A teen mother may have plans for college, and a baby does not fit into that plan.

Sometimes, a mother falls into hardships and can’t financially support a new baby. A difficult situation to discuss is rape. A sexual assault survivor may still be struggling with overcoming the trauma of their experience and may not be emotionally prepared to raise the baby that resulted from the assault. Whatever your reason for choosing adoption, Adoption Choices of Arizona can help you through the adoption process.

Myths About Placing Babies for Adoption

When placing your baby for adoption, you may have heard some myths regarding adoption. Here, we’re going to dispel some of those myths for you so that you can continue your journey with confidence. Some myths you may have heard about birth mothers are…

  • She doesn’t care about your baby
  • She is avoiding responsibility
  • She is giving up 
  • She is from a certain demographic
  • The baby won’t be loved as much as she could have loved it
  • It’s wrong to put a baby up for adoption
  • Placing my baby for adoption makes someone a bad parent

While each of these are myths many birth mothers face and may have concerns about, they are just myths. Let’s dispel these myths below.

Myths About Placing Babies for Adoption Busted

  • You do care for your baby. You wouldn’t be choosing adoption if you didn’t care about your baby. Mothers who choose adoption are searching for a better life for their child, and adoption is a way to make that happen. 
  • Adoption takes time.  We know you care about your baby. You’ve formed that special bond that can only be made through carrying that baby in your womb. It will take time for you to decide on the right family to adopt your baby. It will also take time to heal. Many mothers don’t adopt out their baby to the first family profile they see. This is because you care about who will be raising your child.
  • Adoption is a responsible decision.  If you aren’t ready or prepared to raise a new life emotionally, financially, or otherwise, adoption is the responsible choice. You are making the responsible choice to place your baby in a loving family.
  • You’re not giving up.  Giving up would sure be easy. Carrying a baby for nine months, giving birth, and then working hard to evaluate potential families is work. 
  • Your baby will be loved.  Many adoptive parents can’t have their own biological child. By adopting your baby, they have all the love in the world to give your child. Many families who do have their own biological children also have extra love in their hearts to give and desire another child to care for. Just because your child is adopted doesn’t mean they will be loved any less.
  • It is not wrong to place your baby for adoption.  Placing your baby for adoption is an act of love. You are ensuring your baby will have the best life possible. Through the adoption process, you will have the opportunity to look through family profiles and pick the one you think is best for your baby.
  • Placing your baby for adoption makes you a loving parent.  It shows that you care for the well-being of your baby when you make this decision. It takes love, time, and commitment to find the home you are comfortable placing your baby in.

Choosing an Adoption Agency Near Me

Birth mothers placing their babies for adoption prove their love for their baby by seeking the best option. You show your strength at every step of the adoption process, from finding a local adoption agency to deciding on that one special home. Myths surrounding adoption may be there for now, but what is more important is that you are able to focus on you and your baby.

If you would like more information about the adoption process or adoption agencies in Arizona, feel free to send us a message or call Adoption Choices of Arizona today.